Attachment Theory

I just had a chat with an old friend, and he shared some thoughts on Attachment Theory with me and how it affects today’s society.

(Trying out blogging in point form, like

1) According to Attachment Theory, the first 18 months of relationship built between the infant and his/her caregiver have a serious impact on later relationships in life.

2) Today’s society focus more on its economical needs than psychological needs. Most households have both parents working, leaving its babies in the hands of grandparents or childcare centre.

3) In the case when infant’s psychological needs are not met, he/she will have characteristics of Ambivalent Attachment or Avoidant Attachment. Interestingly, Ambivalent Attachment people tend to be bullies in school, and the Avoidant Attachment people tend to be the being-bullied in school.

4) In the pursuit of happiness, a family which neglects psychological development in infant stage could lead to the child having problems with his/her self-esteem & his/her relationship with the people around him/her. Ironically, leading to unhappiness. Multiply that by a million, and we get a society of unhappy people. Maybe that explains why it is difficult to find happy people in a recent survey conducted in Singapore.

5) Putting on my entrepreneur hat, this could spell a good opportunity for people to design a solution/service to serve this big group of people to provide the best kind of attachment – Secure Attachment.

6) Something that hit me today is: Using Attachment Theory as a tool, to understand my past, why I am who I am, so that I can be better prepared for the future.


2 Responses

  1. Don’t get too attached to that as a framework..while attachment theory made a significant contribution it kinda neglects some things, such as biological (possibly genetic) differences in temperament and also social psychological factors not to mention cultural ones.
    David John Berndt

  2. Thanks for the comment. This is just a theory, but I am surprised how many believe that the first 18 months can seriously affect your relationships with the rest of the world for the next 80 years or so. Because, I have no recollections of my first 18 months. In this case, as you have said, social physchological factors could become more dominant, as I do remember what happend to me when I was in college. Nevertheless, in providing the best for the next generations, I think society today should provide the environment for parents to spend more time with their infants.

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